Ok world...so a couple of days ago my wonderful cousin posted an interesting idea on Facebook. She spoke of how the perfect man would be a combination of the deliciously delectable R&B singer Trey Songz, and the incredibly intelligent President Barack Obama. He would have the smoldering sex appeal of the R&B crooner, while simultaneously being able to contribute to an intelligent conversation. So of course I had to put my two sense in... and agreed that an amalgamation of the two men would be a great idea...and we should work on that wonderful creation asap. About a day ago one of my best girlfriends also contributed to the convo...and added that the perfectly- perfect- chocolate- morsel named Reggie Bush, should be added to this equation...I immediately agreed ( I mean its Reggie Bush enough said). Sooo with the help of my girlfriends we have determined that the perfect man would be a combination of: President Obama, Trey Songz and Reggie Bush à la BarackaReggieSongz. Soo this concept of a perfect man got me thinking...what qualities do I want in a man? I mean I have the generic list in my head: tall, dark, handsome, intelligent blah blah blah...but when I am alone with my thoughts I often ask myself " Lorin what do you really really want...and more importantly , what are you going to do when or if you actually find it? The truth of the matter is, I don't really know exactly what I want. I guess I am on a constant journey to discovering what I want and need. So I guess the voyage to finding my BarackaReggieSongz continues ( good luck to me I think I'm going to need it).
The perfect man, not just a quest for you 20-somethings...
ReplyDeleteWhat makes this idea so intriguing is that it speaks to what most 20-something woman want, and that is their own prince. Some one just for them. And as we 20-something woman know we have a list of qualities that we want him to have. Now whether or not they are all realistic qualities has yet to be discovered but i think that the idea of "the perfect man" keeps a young woman's heart and eyes open. there has to be something that we believe in and if we have that then we know that there is nothing that is out of reach. SO if BarakaReggie- Songz is that man for us 20-something woman, than that is what there is to hold on too and only time will tell if and when he comes along.
ReplyDelete@ Trill- I think your right..I think people of all ages are searching for their idea of perfection. Maybe the criteria that defines "perfection" changes as you get older...(so instead of looking for six pack abs at 20 your looking for a six figure salary and 401K at 40) But I think the idea remains the same.
ReplyDelete@ Shaina- I think we do hold onto that idea to help us strive for something "better", but I am afraid that for me "better" will never come. I am also afraid that holding onto unrealistic expectations will only make it more difficult to find someone special. I often think that people ( not just 20-somethings) excluded great individuals because they don't meet certain criteria on their "list". But on the reverse, that 'list" is what helps us determine our own personal standards and prevents us from settling for less than what we deserve.
Its an intriguing concept... I glad you both find it interesting.
you know what lorin, I agree 110% that holding on to unrealistic expectations may lead to missing out on what reality has to offer. For me, I use the "dreamy" perfect man idea as a gauge to say that if i can think it, i can have it. not that i really think I'll have a barackareggie-songz, but I will have that dream come true of the ultimate happiness with the perfect guy and that to me is the "better" that you speak of. don't sell yourself short. Better will always come if you look to gain it. We only settle when we think what we have is all we can have.
ReplyDeleteI know that BarackaReggie-Songz is out there but the real question is, is he a straight man??
ReplyDeleteThanks for the credit Lorin :)
I am done jokeing now, It is important for is "Brown Girls" to be everything we want in a mate. So, if we want to find our BarackaReggie-Songzes' we would have to be the female equivalent; Without being the typical "type A" dominant Black Woman which is very hard considering that black families are almost always matriarchal because of the declining presence of Black men in family roles. For me BarackaReggie-Songz represents the type of guy that seems to be mythical these days a sexy,straight,intelligent, successful,faithful husband to me and father to the children i wish to have one day.